Why My Brother Is My Hero
Introduction
When I was thirteen, I was very ugly. My nose had grown as much as the Grinch’s heart that fateful Christmas, but the rest of my face stayed the same size. I had bad skin, low self-esteem, and no self-respect. Now, I eat success for breakfastds. But that’s besides the point. The point is that I was repulsive to women- a species I quite fancied at the ripe age of 13. This same year, my older brother returned home from serving a mission for our church to Phoenix, AZ. For some strange reason, every girl I knew started asking me for his number. That’s right: middle school girls were asking me for a 21-year-old’s phone number. Obviously I did not oblige and all those girls can go straight to Hades’s lair for all I carekss.
It was two years earlier when I realized how cool my brother is. Unfortunately, I admitted I loved and admired him and was sorry for being a dirt bag our entire lives while we were waiting for him to board a flight to that same Phoenix, AZ mission (poor timing on my part). But the realization that he wouldn’t be around anymore really sunk in the fact that he had taught me a lot about what it means to be a man. I hope to do him justice in this post. My only goal is for you, the reader, to understand just how awesome my brother really is.
Educational Perseverance
My brother has some learning disabilities- namely ADHD. Whether or not this is an actual disability is something I could hotly contest. His physicality and energy make my brother, well, my brother. However, due to the societal expectations of how a “student”should “learn”, school doesn’t come naturally to my brother.
This led my brother down a path of thinking he was an idiot throughout his entire life. The modern school system completely failed my brother and teachers even emphasized the belief that he is stupid just because he has high energy. Don’t get me started—I’d like a few minutes alone in a room with no cameras with some of those teachers… but enough about those losers; BACK TO MY BROTHER.
Despite these disabilities, my brother graduated high school (something people didn’t think he could do), then graduated with a bachelors degree from BYU-Idaho. Not only that, but this degree required him to memorize and contextualize every bone, muscle, ligament, etc. of the body. Not only did he accomplish that, he never forgot it. He didn’t just cram to pass the test- he retained it! Suck that coach Perez. Look who’s an idiot now! I digress…
Now, after college my brother hit a rough patch. What he thought could be a good insurance-based career fizzled out. Instead of complaining and playing the victim, he pulled his metaphorical boots on and got back to studying. This time, to pass the real estate exam; something I genuinely wouldn’t ever want to try. The results? Passed on the first try and achieved great success in the real estate field in his very first years as an agent.
As Iuck would have it, #bidenomics ruined the economykss. The housing market crashed and my brother was up a creek without a paddle and “cursed” with a brain that “can’t learn”. What do you think he did? He said “screw it” and pursued pilot school. As of writing this, he’s still studying for some exams but, he’s going to pass, despite what everyone told him he wasn’t capable of growing up.
Humility
Have you ever met someone who was just kind of good at everything? Musically talented, physically strong and coordinated, even good looking? Yeah that’s my brother.
He’s played sports his whole life, but our family was never financially able to support a more competitive/long-term commitment to something like that so my brother played recreational sports growing up.
One story I love, that my dad tells, involves my brother’s rec team getting the opportunity to play a premier competitive team in a scrimmage. I’m not sure how this opportunity came about, but it did. My brother’s team spanked this competitive team. They were better in every way and I think a large part of that was my brother’s natural talent. But, as I’m writing this, I realize that my brother has never told that story.
Another story he won’t ever tell: My brother was playing intramural soccer as his college- a school with no collegiate-level competitive sports teams. Again, I can’t remember the details, but a soccer coach from a D1 school somehow stumbled on my brother playing goalie. He came up to him after the game and asked why he didn’t play college soccer and offered him a position on his team. My brother turned him down- after all, he had a wife and child to support.
Don’t even talk to me about how amazing my brother was a baseball- we have pictures of him mid-pitch in middle school and you’d think it was a professional pitcher. And hockey? Forgettaboitit. He skates like my wife exists: beautifully.
All of this talent, and I really don’t think he’s ever even said “yeah I’m pretty good at soccer” or “I could’ve made it to the big leagues”. He always remains uncharacteristically quiet in those conversations. A man who actually has a glory day to relive, yet he chooses not to. What a stud.
He Works and Works and Works
One of my favorite things is to visit my brother at work. In college, that was the ring shop- where he worked full time while finishing that difficult bachelors degree. He would do anything he could to help anyone that came into that shop- including getting me a custom ring for my finance.
If you ever visit my brother at work, you’ll notice two things. First- everyone stares at him. The boys want to be him. The girls want to have him. He’s magnetic, wherever he is. The next thing you’ll notice is that, despite the possible jealously in the air, everyone still loves him. If I had a dollar for every time someone said “oh I just love him”, I’d, realistically, have like two to three hundred dollars. I know that doesn’t seem like a lot, but 300 people saying they love a guy to another person they’ve just met? I mean I know it’s not a million dollars, but I don’t know if I’ve even had a million conversations in my entire life so saying that would just be foolish. Sometimes hyperbole makes the truth seem disappointing... Anyways, no one works with my brother and hates him—that’s what I’m trying to get at.
Now, you’ll find him working three jobs while going to pilot school. He cuts ice at two facilities and does full time real estate. And you know what I still hear every time I go to see him at work? Middle school girls asking for his numberds.
His Personality
A lot of what makes my brother great involves his ability to love. He has energy that is never depleted. He has the ability to love and love and love and love, without ever getting worn out. He is the guy that can hold a conversation with anyone and, maybe it’s his dreamy eyes, but he makes you feel loved when you speak with him.
His energy lends to his ability to be the life of the party. Everyone was excited when my brother could make it to cousin sleepovers because he made everything so much fun. He enabled fun, physical, adrenaline-fueled activities that no one else could. I’ll admit, as a young boy, his emphasis on physicality caused me to fear for my life when mom and dad would go on dates. But now, there’s nothing better than a hug from my sweet brother.
He smiles. All the time. He’s happy and he smiles constantly. When my brother is down, it must be real bad because that smile of his can whether the harshest of storms. Not to mention, his smile rivals that of Ryan Gosling’s.
The light of my brother fills every room he enters. He’s amazing and his ability to love and have fun will always be something I look forward to being around.
Humor
Anyone who’s spent time with me and my two brothers knows how crazy things can get. As sober people, we have been hailed as being crazier that others’ “drunkest of friends”. This is something I might not necessarily be “proud” of, but I will admit, times with them are the greatest. And the party never starts without some silly, off-color, inside joke between us.
Besides all the inside-humor we share, my brother has this uncanny gift for impressions. Ask him to recite lines from “Angels in the Outfield” or “Remember the Titans”. Somehow they always get me. I feel that his impressions are very undervalued. They make me giggle every time.
These impressions lend him to being a good story teller. Man alive- some of the stories he relays about his life experiences are always augmented by his impressions of the characters in them. If you ever get him alone in a room, have him tell you the story of the cross-dresser at The Pines. Trust me.
Faithful
My brother is faithful in more ways than one. Spiritually, his testimony of Jesus Christ is unshakeable. His testimony has been a rock for me to build mine on. He has served in many callings and always seems to be serving neighbors and folks in his congregation , when he can.
He has taught seminary for a church- a class for high school students to study the scriptures at 6:00am. Never once did he complain about this, in fact, he bore witness of the things he taught and shared his spiritual insights constantly. I can’t imagine that the girls in his class were ever too tired to pay attention to his lessons.
He is also faithful to his commitments. He gets up at 4:00am every day to cut ice all while still fulfilling his roles at his other jobs and never complains. He works out every day: remaining faithful to his promises to himself. He loves his wife unabashedly and will always be faithful to her. He is loyal to his family and friends and would never backbite or betray them in any way. He’s a man of his word and there’s not many people one can say that about in today’s age.
Conclusion
This list could go on and on. My brother takes care of me and everyone around him. His personality and energy fills this glum world with joy. A light like his is something that should not be squandered. The world is a better place because he’s in it.
With all that said—I now say, with love, directly to my brother: If you read this, please shave the mustache. Your face deserves to be seen. I miss your upper lip. However, just as you ask me to go fly with you and I decline, so will you, likely, decline this request. And so we are at an impasse.
###(Update on Jan 18, 2024) Remarkable cook, this guy. Try his steaks.